My Days In A Mansion: Sigma
by Daxent
Summary: A recreation of a old classic. A story that crosses over many different games. Ayane has finally done it. She brought the squad back from the bottom, and to the top. But when things go to worse, the mansion that she's won has a dark secret...


Disclaimer: Yes, I am Jammin Saladtard's real life friend, and he gave me permission to improve upon his story of booze, boobs, and weed.

All characters, trademarks, or mentionings of stuff that I do not own are property of their rightful owners.

Aaaaaaaaand, lets roll.

My Days In A Mansion Sigma

Day 0:

It was a normal day in Neo Japan, where strangly ninjas existed and they lived in a place that seemed like a feudal hellhole. Who knows? Maybe in the future, Japan gets a countryside that ninjas live on. But, that's beside the point.

In Ryu's home...

The "Ninja Squad" as they self proclaimed, consisted of Hayate, Ayane, Ryu, and Kasumi. For once, they all seemed to get along. But then... "Bad news..." Kasumi's head went down in sadness. "Our contractor has left the Tecmo company."

"WHAT?!" Hayate looked shocked. "Yes. I'm afraid, he wasn't getting his bonus." Ayane sighed. "So, does that mea-" Ryu was cut off by the annoying ring of a phone. He reluctantly picked it up, seeing that it was from Tecmo.

_We are deeply sorry to inform you that you have been found to have over 74 accounts of Insurance Violation. Furthermore, everything that you own will be taken away for the homeless, as you do not have enough money to cover the mortgage for the house. In order to piss you off even more, you have lost your house, your possesions, and your sushi. Thank you, and have a good day. To listen to this message again, go kill yourself, and see what happens._

Ryu just stood shocked. Seeing his entire life go boom before his eyes. Hayate came over to the table, asking what had happened. "Dude...we're gonna' go homeless." Ryu gulped. Ayane lost it, lunging at Ryu screaming. "DIE MOTHERFUCKER! HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN?!" She screamed so hard that she bit her tounge.

"Isn't there any place that we could live at?" Kasumi asked curiously, holding back her little sister from ripping out Ryu's eyeballs. "...Rachel's place?" Kasumi let Ayane go, as being pissed off by Ryu even mentioning Rachel.

"Ryu, please...PLEASE don't tell me that you said that..." Kasumi said, sadistically.

"Ow. Ayane, stop. SERIOUSLY AYANE, STOP. OH GOD! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD! NOT THOSE! OW!"

"YOU DESERVE THIS!" Ayane shouted as she raised her Tanto. Kasumi, grabbing her sister once again, stopped Ayane from delivering the finishing blow.

"Ryu, did you mention that slut, Rachel?" Kasumi looked at him with anger. "Yeah, what's so bad about Rachel?" Ryu asked curiously.

"She walks around with her little "Scary" demon scythe, and thinks shes better then everyone else." Kasumi's eyes now went red. "And...the FUCKING LAST THING I WANT TO DO..." She loosened her grip on Ayane. "IS TO SLEEP IN THAT WHORE'S HOUSE!" She yelled as she let loose of Ayane.

Hayate, just standing in a corner, said to himself "God...this is going to be a long night. Better bust out the booze!"

After Ayane was done leaving Ryu a bloodied mess, she went outside looking for any change that people might've dropped. And that's when she stumbled upon something. A bottle wrapper, that said "You are a winner! Go online now, on www.****************.com to claim your prize! (A.N.: Sorry, I didn't want anybody who stupidly managed to type in the url.) Hurry up though! Because this expires after 4/20!" Ayane gasped. "Todays 4/20! I gotta' register this now! ...Speaking of 4/20...HAYATE! PUT THAT BONG DOWN!"

Ayane rushed upstairs, and turned on her custom built computer based on the Linux OS. Yeah, she was good with computers. She went online, and went over to the register. When all of a sudden her browser crashed. "Damn Firefox! Always crashing!" She restored it. "Thank god that Firefox has a built in refresher!"

She entered in all of her info, and left one disturbing one blank that asked what color of panties she wore. When she tried to register, she was denied and was literally demanded to fill that out. "Jesus...uh..." She looked through her sisters closet, not wanting to show them any of HER information. She went back over to the computer. "Uh...Red cherry?"

Kasumi walked in. "Red Cherry what?" "Um...your..." Ayane was struggling to finish the sentence. "Your...YOUR STARBURST!" Kasumi looked confused. "My...starburst?" "Yeah! The starburst that you ate earlier today!" "Oh."With that, Kasumi walked out of the room. Ayane sighed. "God..." The computer finished testing the results. "CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE WON..."

-Commercial Break-

Buy Ninja Gaiden Sigma! It has all the big boobs, blood, action, and explosions that you could possibly want!

Dad: I'm too much of a tool, Billy, don't grow up like me, and buy Ninja Gaiden Sigma.  
Billy: What's Ninja Gaiden Sigma Daddy?

ONLY THE THING THAT WILL MAKE YOU SHIT YOUR PANTS!

Whatever you need to make it through the day, that shitty teacher being a pain in the ass? Kick her pancreas down her asshole!  
Taco Sauce getting in your Mac & Cheese? FUCKING OBLITHERATE THAT SHIT!

This is the perfect side order to POWERTHIRST! But this commercial fails to have enough awesomeness instore to be able to show the KICKASS DESCRIPTION OF POWERTHIRST!

-Commercial ended-

"...A FREE iPOD NANO!"

"Argh!" Ayane shouted as she closed out the pop up. "God dammit! Piece of shit Ads got through noscript!" "Congratulations, you have won a mansion!"

Ayane shouted and jumped in joy.

So, this was my first story. Ever. If you wish to review, please do so and tell me what you think.


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